Ever since my Arthritis pains turned into severe Rheumatoid Arthritis, life has changed. My pain is felt all throughout my body, from my jaw, to my toes and fingers(24-7). My spare time is spent taking long naps and calling it a night, early in the evening. My husband and I were visited by our Bishop and his counselor. I hate to admit, I've been a bit inactive, because it has really become a whole lot harder to get out of bed in the morning. I force my body up, every morning at 4:00am and drag my cripple body to work. I come home, after work and lay in bed until the next work day. I know this sounds crazy, but that is really how much pain I've been in. I lost 12 pounds in 1 week because I'm never hungry. I take so much medication for my pain and I can't even open my mouth wide enough, to eat.
This may all sound depressing but I don't feel to bad about it all. I'm thankful I still wake up in the arms of my loving husband, my best friend. I'm grateful I can limp over to my daughters room to kiss her forehead, while she's in bed, sleeping. We have been called to the Scouts, as den leaders. I'm excited but at the same time, overwhelmed and nervous that I may not be able to hang with this group. I don't mean to vent and I'm sure you really aren't the least bit interested. I just felt like blogging about it. Hopefully, my next appointment with my Rheumatologist in April, will be able to get me started on the Embrel, so I can have my body back. Words will never be able to justify the gratitude in my heart for my family. They help so much with Lana, taking her to her piano lessons, math tutor, reading literacy class and her dance lesson. I wanted to keep her busy in after school programs and they make it all possible. They have made my life a lot easier. They have been a great blessing. I ♥ my Family so much! Thank you, mom, dad, Sho, Lana, Mone and Jr. I can't imagine life without you all.